The Internet is becoming more and more a part of the lives of children every day. The Internet is amazing; I use it every day and it’s provided me with a network of friends and connections that I would not have otherwise made. The trouble with the Internet though, is it offers a degree of anonymity that you never would have in a face to face encounter. While you are online, you can be anything or anyone. And so can anyone else. Therein lies a huge danger that I have observed parents being woefully inadequate at addressing when they permit their children to come online.
I have volunteered my time as a moderator for one of the largest teen communities on these great Tubes and the things I have seen in my various positions are downright frightening. While most of these communities are marketed towards young teens, some pre-teens sneak their way on by lying about their age. The issue is, these communities have no way of validating the age of the members who register on the site. Thus is the nature of the Internet, as stated above, you can be whoever you want and no one is the wiser. Fortunately, the vast majority of these sites have an amazing policy in place that immediately removes any member who confesses to being under 13. For more on that, you can familiarize yourself with this wonderful government policy known as COPPA To put it briefly, COPPA makes it illegal for any online organization to store the personal information of individuals under the age of 13.
Upon registering with these communities, children are instantly connected to tens of thousands (or in some cases tens of millions) of other individuals of ages ranging from very young to very old. This puts unmonitored children in a very dangerous position, especially children who have been left woefully ignorant of the dangers of the Internets. It is not uncommon for online predators to find their way onto these communities, nor is it uncommon for them to lie to children to get close to them. You can search for articles on this on your own time.
There is good news though! For their part in this, most of the communities I have been involved in handle COPPA requests very quickly and very seriously. They do what they can to keep your children safe. Likewise they handle any evidence of predatory behavior with the utmost seriousness and work with federal law enforcement to keep their members, that is to say your children, safe. Many sites employ massive teams of moderators and administrators whose sole duty it is to keep naughty stuff and naughty people out of the way of your children. Even with all these precautions on the part of the company, still, bad things happen; someone or something slips through cracks. Leaving you to wonder, what can be done?
This is where you, the parents, come in. Have you talked to your children about online safety? Have you told them what they should and should not tell people they meet online? Have you monitored and researched the sites they surf? Are you familiar with the reporting systems in place for your convenience and for your child’s safety? I’m guessing the answer to roughly 90% of those questions is going to be no. Thus, there is the glaring gap in our online safety. You didn’t mean to do it, I know. You probably didn’t even think about it, you aren’t at fault! Good news, it’s an easy fix!
Sit your kid down, talk to them. Explain that not everything on the internet is what it seems on the surface. Explain that, unfortunately, people lie. Explain how dangerous it can be to share their address, their phone number, their school name, their real name, all that good stuff. And you know what else? Watch them online for a few days. Monitor the content and the people your children come into contact with. Research the websites they go to in order to be sure that the content the site allows is in line with what you want your children exposed to. If you have any questions, contact a moderator or administrator for the site, that’s why they are there. Some sites even have a query and complaint form with which you can contact the staff directly for answers to many of your questions.
The Internet is a phenomenal tool not just for research, but also for social development and entertainment. As I’ve said, the online communities that teenagers frequent are doing what they can to ensure your children are safe while the children are using the company’s product (some sites are much better at this than others), but the biggest burden in your child’s safety while using these communities rests with you.
If you have any questions or comments, please don’t be afraid to contact me. I would be thrilled to help you in any way I can.
